If you were hoping to read a lovely post from Bronywyn, ah, I’m sorry to disappoint. You get me instead. I’m not nearly as lyrical as Bron, and I don’t have that awesome Aussie accent. But…I do have angst. Lots of it. And today–lucky you, grasshopper!–you get a sneak peek inside my head.

(Note: Run far away! Fast! This is a scary place to see.)

A few years ago (three to be exact), I wrote out my mental process when working on a book and posted it on my blog. Then I was unpublished and not working on deadline. Now I am. It was fun to look at what I wrote back then and see how/if it has changed. To my surprise, not a whole lot is different. My mental process when I’m writing is pretty much the same. The difference now – when I’m under deadline – is it’s amplified. A lot.

ELISABETH’S MANUSCRIPT STAGES

Stage One – The Proposal

• Chapter One – My shiny new idea isn’t quite so shiny anymore. I forgot how much I hate writing first chapters. Hook? Hook? Gah! I hate hooks. I’m clearly hook-illiterate.

• Chapter Two – Okay, maybe this isn’t quite so bad. New POV, the setting works, I’m getting into the story. And wow, I sorta like my characters. Gonna have to go back and make some changes in chapter one, but I think this just might fly.

• Chapter Three – Zip, zip, zip through the first three chapters. My agent is going to love this.

• Synopsis – Pause to work on suckopsis. Pull hair out by the roots. Whine and complain on IM to anyone who happens to be online. Finally get it done and badda-bing…send away.

• Wait – And Wait. And Wait. At this point I should be used to waiting. But you know what? Not so much.

Stage Two – The Reality

• Chapter Four – Okay, now what? It sold? Oh, boy. Now I have to write it. The idea made sense in the synopsis. But that was months ago. I haven’t looked at this thing since my agent sent it off. Oy. I think I’m in trouble here…

• Chapter Five – Getting into the groove. I actually like this. This story might just work. Sure, characters are angsty, but they’re fun.

• Chapter Six - I am the best writer on the planet! This is going to be a NY Times Best Seller! Maybe I should take a break and think about writing my RITA speech.

Stage Three – The Middle

• Chapter Seven – (Right around the 125 pg mark). OMG. What was I thinking?! This is the most contrived piece of drivel that was ever written!  I’ll have to PAY people to read it.  And melodramatic? Argh. Sounds like a bad version of Days Of Our Lives. I’ll probably get sued.

• Chapter Eight – I’m too far in to give up. I will not give up. I will NOT! I have a contract. People are counting on me. Push through, push through, just keep pushing…

• Chapters Nine through Eleven – Okay, if nothing else, I like my characters. I don’t have a clue where the plot is going, but the characters are strong. That’s something at least.

• Chapter Twelve – The hero’s getting on my nerves. He needs sex. At this point though I have NO idea where I’m going to fit that in. But seriously? If he doesn’t quit pestering me I’m going to slit my wrists.

• Chapter Thirteen – Oh, crap. I’ve passed the halfway mark and I STILL have all these plot points to get through. I’m going over my target word count, there’s no way I’ll get all this in here in 100K words. No way. I’m doomed.

• Chapter Fourteen – Need chocolate. Must. Have. Chocolate. These two are driving me nuts. My editor isn’t going to give a rip about these two. And the plot? Holy Crapoli. How will I ever tie this all together?

• Chapter Fifteen – Building. Slowly. But still so much to get through. *big sigh* Okay, refocus. Time to get serious. I can do this. Really, I can. I might lose all my eyebrows in the process, but I can do this.

Part Four – The Beginning of the End

• Chapter Sixteen – Tension, angst, black moment foreshadowing (and that’s mostly for me, not the book)

• Chapter Seventeen – Here it comes. Climax build up. Black Moment. Yes, hero, I know you hate me. Hang on with me. I won’t leave you out to dry, I promise.

• Chapter Eighteen – BAM. Black Moment. UGH. I’m emotionally drained. I need coffee. Or chocolate. Or coconut cream pie. Mmm…wonder if Shari’s is still open…

• Chapter Nineteen – Climax. My shoulders are tight. I feel like crawling out of my skin. Maybe I should kill someone just for the fun of it to ease all this stress?

• Chapter Twenty – Resolution. Wrap up all the loose ends. Surprisingly, I did it! Kissy-face moment. Slobber, slobber, pant, drool all over each other. Man, I write pure sap. But it’s not half-bad sap.

Type T-H-E E-N-D.

Reeeeeeeeeeelief. I should get a medal or something. Too bad no one in the house will care that I finally finished. Wonder if there’s champagne somewhere…

Hit “send”.

Stare at blinking cursor.

Feel something funny. What is that? Oh yeah. I recognize that flutter in my belly. It’s angst. Not over writing the book but over the fact I finished. Was the book crap or was it really good? Now I’m just not sure! And I have to wait to hear from my editor to find out the answer? (There go the eyebrows for sure…)

*smacks hand against forehead* Why do I do this again?

*sigh*

On to the next proposal…

* * *

Right now I’m at the Chapter 19 stage with the WIP. Yes, you guessed it, the I-feel-like-crawling-out-of-my-skin stage. I walked around the house in quite a mood today and each time the DH asked what was wrong I nearly bit his head off. It’s not easy to put the I-want-to-kill-someone-and-it-doesn’t-necessarily-have-to-be-a-book-character mentality into words without getting thrown in a padded cell, so I’ve been keeping it to myself. The GOOD news is in another week I’ll be past this stage (please, God) and will be staring at that blinking cursor wondering what to work on next. But in the meantime…angst is me. It’s back to the keyboard I go for some more self-inflicted torture.

How about you? Are you angsting over anything right now? (And I don’t think that’s a word, but I’m using it anyway.) Christmas Shopping, Holidays, the residual ACK! leftover from spending Turkey day with your in-laws? Share your angst with me. I could use a good diversion right about now.

I’m haunting Amazon and Best Buy this weekend looking for good deals. So far I’ve gotten Nora Roberts’s BLACK HILLS on audio for $8, Young Frankenstein for $2, Star Trek for $9 and some Nintendo DS games for my friend’s sons for $10 each.

I hate shopping, but am sorely tempted to hit the Best Buy in a few hours for the $200 HP laptop they have on sale. From an Apple girl, well, you have to know what kind of deal that is!

I’ve done Black Friday before, but years and years ago, at Target, when they gave out cute little bags to the first 100 shoppers. I don’t even know what compelled me to get out there, but it wasn’t so bad. My dh has gone twice, once for a $200 camcorder and another for a PS2. Both times he said he sprinted for the doorway. So if I go to Best Buy, I’m on my own, he said.

What about you? Do you shop the Black Friday deals? What would tempt you to leave your cozy bed and brave the cold and the crowds?

Someone made the mistake of giving me a platform on Thanksgiving.

I love turkey.

I fell in love with my first turkey at age 10. Oh I’d eaten plenty of them before that, but that was the year I got to pull the wishbone and my pull ended up with the largest part, thus my wish would come true. If you don’t know the legend of the wishbone you can read it here. 

The next turkey I fell in love with I married. I got up at 3 am on Thanksgiving day to prepare our first Thanksgiving meal. I discovered the bird (20 pounds) only took 4 hours. (I went back to bed) All those years my mother got up in the middle of the night to prepare Thanksgiving dinner. To this day I am still confused.

Today I will have officially prepared …wait, I can’t tell you how many turkeys I’ve made, you’d do the math wouldn’t you?

Let’s just say more than forty and less than seventy.

That’s a lot of turkeys I have loved. All those turkey dinners were made from scratch: stuffing, potatoes, pies, breads, yada, yada, yada.

After all those turkeys the lightbulb has finally gone off. 

I’d rather be writing!

Here’s the plan for today:

Up at 8: Work on WIP (writer lingo for my work-in-progress) until ….

10 am: Throw the bird in oven. Take Marie Callender’s pie assortment out of freezer to thaw in fridge.

10:15 am -1:30:  Work on WIP.

1:30 pm: Microwave instant mashed potatoes (4 minutes),  Zap the Reser’s green bean casserole, and mashed sweet potatoes. Throw jars of gravy in saucepan (heat on low).  Prepare Stovetop stuffing. Keep family member’s busy making tossed salad and opening cans of black olives and jellied cranberries.

2 pm: Remove turkey and slice. Toss rolls in oven. Set table. Pour generous glass of very nice Washington State wine.

2:15: Eat with the family.

2:30: Throw dishes in dishwasher, leftovers in fridge. Insert DVD- Die Hard 17 for family to watch on the couch.

2:30 - 9 pm: Work on WIP

THE END

Happy Thanksgiving!

I just got home from an exhausting and fun-filled day of pre-Black Friday shopping. Because I teach, Christmas shopping presents a challenge. When I’m elbow deep in end-of-semester grading, it’s hard to find time (or energy) to find that perfect gift. This year, I really wanted to get some of it out of the way early, which got me thinking of our holiday shopping rituals.

Today, we spent our day at an outlet mall. This particular outlet will open at 12 a.m. this Black Friday. After filling up on Turkey, shoppers from near and far check in to the adjacent hotels. They take power naps before piling into the stores where they hope to find that deeply discounted Coach bag or Nike sweat suit. Some people come for the sales; some people come for the fun; some people come hoping to catch two grandmas duke it out over an extra frilly Christmas dress. Others stay away altogether.

I’m a member of the latter group. Crowds make me…nervous. The one time I made it out at an ungodly hour to go shopping on Black Friday, I didn’t even leave my car. One look at the line snaking through the parking lot had me heading right back home. In my house, we’re big fans of “Cyber Monday” (though we watch online sales all through the weekend). No crowds, no sore feet. (Admittedly, however, less fun than scoping sales with friends.)

I have several friends who never miss Black Friday. Some of them carefully plan their days and know which bargains they’re after. They have lists and time tables, and I wouldn’t put it past one of them to throw a couple elbows if that’s what it took. Others go because they see Black Friday as a spectator sport. If they happen to grab a couple deals, all the better.

But today, as we went store to store at this outlet mall, the one thing we kept hearing from retailers was that today’s sales were either the same as or better than the ones they would put out on Friday. Retail games. And that makes sense, doesn’t it? When Friday brings a mad rush of frantic shoppers determined to cross gifts off their lists (much like me today), they’re primed to buy. Not every item needs to be its most discounted price to score a sale.

Then again, maybe telling us that today’s deals are as good as Friday’s was just another retail game. It’s hard to say. However, my living room full of bags is proof enough that the deals seemed good to me. I surely won’t be headed back Friday to do price checks.

So what about you all? Do you do any holiday shopping? Have you started? Will you go Friday? Or do you wait until the last minute? Or perhaps you prefer to shop online? Whatever you choose, I’d love to hear your bargain shopping tips (holiday and otherwise).

I’ve been really enjoying Glee (and sad that we’re a week or so behind the US here in Oz) but last week something happened on the show that made my writer self think “hmmmm.”  Now writing is all about creating a world and inviting the reader or watcher to suspend disbelief, step inside that world and stay there, so you don’t want them pausing to think “hmmmm.”

In Glee, there’s a teen pregnancy subplot (I won’t say who in case anyone is behind on the show).  And the episode I just saw had a big subplot around the fact that the girl is pressuring the boy for money to pay the medical bills that she’s intercepting and hiding from her parents.  Which would be fine except for the part in the episode or two before where her pregnancy became public knowledge in the school via the school’s gossip blogger. So I now have a lot of difficulty believing that her parents wouldn’t have found out when every kid in that high school and you can just bet some of them have told their parents (and it’s set in a small town) plus all the teachers know she’s pregnant.

Now, it’s not yet a big enough issue for me to completely give up on the show because it’s not a major plot and I love the rest of the show too much but if the writers don’t address it or fix it and keep playing the “secret” pregnancy angle, I can tell it’s going to bug me a lot.  For another thing, the girl in question is quite slim (so she won’t be able to hide it too long) plus she’s been kicked out of something that was a big part of her life, which would also be hard to hide from the parents.  So if they keep playing the story this way, they’re going to have to come up with a brilliant reason why her parents don’t know or I’ll be gnashing my teeth.

Even if they do fix it, as a writer, it’ll bug me a bit in the back of my mind.  The way that the fact that the writers of Gilmore Girls had Rory not know what a Birkin bag was when her rich boyfriend gave her one bugs me every time I watch the last series of Gilmore Girls. For those who’ve never watched Gilmore Girls, Rory and her mom Lorelei are complete pop culture divas, read lots of magazines and watch copious amounts of TV.  A Birkin bag was a big deal in a Sex and the City episode and they also feature regularly in fashion mags as they’re very hard to get and hideously expensive so I didn’t buy that Rory would be so clueless about one. Maybe at the beginning of the show when she was sixteen but not at twenty two. Again, it doesn’t ruin the show for me but it does kick me out of the world every time in that episode.  Which isn’t good. And in this case the bag didn’t even really play a role other than “rich boyfriend gives expensive present that impresses Grandmother”. It didn’t get lost or stolen and you never see Lorelei’s reaction (and Lorelei would definitely know what a Birkin was).  It’s never mentioned again. It was a complete waste of valuable story time.

So my question is when does a writerly error or inconsistent plot idea become too much for you?  What will you put up with?  Personally I think a TV series has more leeway because they’re telling a much longer story than a book or a movie and I tend to think “hey they might fix this” if I like the rest of the world.  In a book I have less faith. How about you?  What throws you out of a world (other than times when you just don’t connect with the writing)?  Plot problems? Stupid characters? Anachronisms or contradictions in world ‘rules’? Do you have a short or long “wallbanger” fuse?

Photo credit (Licensed under Creative Commons 2.0)

I have this friend…let’s call her MJ. She recently set up a Facebook page.

MJ has never been a big fan of social networking (she still doesn’t tweet). She likes email and phone calls and figures if people have a genuine desire to get in touch with her, they’ll do it without the help of the latest Internet fad. While she finds herself enjoying Facebook more than she expected—it is nice to get an update on several people’s lives with one click—some aspects of “friending” aren’t as warm and welcoming as others.

Person-you’ve-never-heard-of. Nowadays, seeing “1 friend request” in the corner of your Facebook page is nearly as exciting as “you’ve got mail” used to be when e-mail was new. Except when I click on the request, I discover…I’ve never heard this name in my life. Who are you and why do you want status updates on a total stranger? Did I pop up as a “suggestion” and you figured you’d throw me in as # 3,543 on your friend list? Sorry, dude (or gal). I keep my page limited to people I’ve actually met. (Note: meeting online counts. I have writer friends I’ve never seen in person, but I still know who they are!)

Person-you-last-saw-at-age-twelve. Okay, I get reminiscing with classmates from high school and college. Those years are powerful and hold a lot of (hopefully) incredible experiences. But middle school? I’m in my 30’s (BARELY, I might add). The last time you saw me, I was sitting in a seventh-grade classroom with bad hair, no fashion sense, and a Babysitters Club book. You never spoke two words to me, and now you’re like, “Hey! So great to see you!” Riiiight. Yes, I’m hot now (lol), and no, I haven’t forgotten that you picked me last in gym class every week. That aside, I’m pretty sure there are too many years and not enough memories to bother getting in touch.

The ex. Talk about melodrama. There are hordes of articles out there blaming Facebook for crumbling marriages, because old flames keep hooking up via their Walls. I’m not sure why anyone would choose Facebook for this, especially if someone is looking for trouble—it’s not exactly private. Two entire friend lists probably don’t want to watch a couple swap stories about that time in the library during sophomore year…and does anyone really want to see an ex’s honeymoon pics while perusing his or her profile? I wouldn’t dream of looking up the guys I (during a lapse in judgment) dated and hope to H-E-double-hockey-sticks they never find me. Eww. Why, again, did we invent this way of coming back and haunting people who might not want to remember us?

All right, I admit, I…I mean, MJ…enjoys logging on to Facebook each day. I just feel like playing devil’s advocate. What do you think—are some people best left in the past, or do you enjoy catching up with best friends from elementary school? Is Facebook really the end of marriage as we know it? And have you ever sent a friend request to a complete stranger?

I hate to break it to you like this, but we’re exactly six days from the official beginning of “The Holiday Season.” Decorations have been popping up in malls and department stores around my neck of the woods for a few weeks now.

I have to confess, I love the holidays. I go way over the top, and spend most of the month of January recovering from my decorating, baking, shopping, and feasting indulgences. But I love it all. And what I love most are the traditions our family observes.

Welcome to the Brown's!

Observes seems to be such a serious term for this time of year, because some of our traditions are just plain silly. For instance, there is a bag of rocks and dead leaves along with an open raggedy-bag of stick-on Christmas bows that are traded around each year. These two completely worthless items are wrapped elaborately and slipped under the tree disguised as a thoughtfully chosen gift. Two years ago our youngest son, Jeremy, wrapped the bag of bows for our grand-daughter, Alex. He went all out, obtaining a box about the size of a washing machine, filling it with crumpled newspaper and a series of diminishing-sized wrapped gifts. The anticipation built for about four days before Christmas. Alex went crazy trying to imagine what Uncle Jeremy had gotten for her that so huge. We had a great thirty minutes of entertainment as she unwrapped and climbed her way down to the bottom to find the bag of bows! She was a great sport, of course. And of course, Jeremy got them back in a different fashion the following year.

But in a world of change, change, change, we can’t let ourselves get uptight if traditions have to make some little changes. My husband and I began our married lives negotiating both Thanksgiving and Christmas between three locations: my family, his family, and his grandparents. At this time we still lived in our hometown, so we were just traveling across town.

Then, we moved about one hundred and fifty miles away. Traditions were maintained, but we traveled further than across town. As our children grew and got jobs of their own, we had to transition once more. Our oldest son became a marching Toy Solider who played the snare drum in the big Walt Disney World Magic Kingdom parades and had to work on Christmas Day. We weren’t about to leave our son to wake up alone on Christmas Morning before going to make magic.

The tradition transitioned. We began traveling to see our parents the weekend before Christmas. Which was great. We ended up celebrating twice. All good.

My favorite transitioning tradition is making Christmas recordings. We have a recording studio and production company, so recording equipment is always at the ready. The first Christmas recording was a cassette of our then kindergardener and three year old singing beautiful childhood carols and and talking about who they loved. It’s priceless now that they’re grown men.

The next transition of this tradition came with video, which we produced for three years. These included our family acting out ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas, and the boys lip-syncing Bruce Springsteen’s Santa Claus is Coming to Town complete with Matthew on drums and Jonathan on guitar and lead vocals. This was a long time before Wii and Rock Band.

Uncle Matt and Alex getting down

For the last ten years we’ve transitioned this tradition to the studio facility we have here at the house. After our big Christmas breakfast and the wild shredding of wrapping paper, we resume recording the year’s chosen Beatles’ song. You thought I was going to say Christmas carol, right?

Jonathan laying down guitar tracks

Nope. It’s a Beatles’ song. We choose a song that has a chorus with a lot of voices like “All You Need is Love”, “Hey, Jude”, or my personal favorite “Yellow Submarine.”  (Our version is spectacular, if I do say so myself) Whoever is at the house by Christmas night has to participate in some aspect of the recording, either singing in the chorus (vocal ability isn’t required). Through the years we have contributions from about seven ex-girlfriends, my dad (who passed away four years ago) on bass guitar, cousins, nieces, nephews, friends and Elvis, the family dog who left our building in 2006.

Jeremy plays keys

So many good times. So many wonderful memories.

The point is when things must change, when life forces us to adjust and tweak our traditions, things aren’t really lost, they’re just different. The family is still together and growing. When we lose someone, we hold on tight to the memories of them and the love they gave us. We reach out to embrace the new people who have come into our lives.

I wish I could share some tracks with you. They’re surprisingly good, but also copyrighted material. So what are some of your traditions and how have they transitioned? Sharing is the spirit of the holidays!

The life of a writer ain’t glamorous, that’s for sure. I know—insert my childrens’ eye-rolls here along with their snarky comment. “Call the Waaambulance!”

My next release, Breakfast in Bed was set to launch December first, so I’ve been frantically writing blogs for a month-long tour that was supposed to end the same day my next book, As Good as He Gets, is due on my editor’s desk. Needless to say, I was feeling a little stressed. It didn’t help matters when I received an email from my editor breaking the news that there was something wrong with the shipment of Breakfast in Bed. (Pause and take a deep breath, it’s just a couple of bumps right?) It seems that the red foil on the cover was sticking more to people’s hands than to the books. The entire shipment had to be sent back and reprinted. The new shipment is scheduled to hit the warehouse on the same day they were supposed to have hit the shelves. It’s a long and bumpy road we writers travel…

Luckily, most of the blog tour was rescheduled for a January launch. So, for everyone who is looking forward to buying Breakfast in Bed, it’s just gonna be a little late. The good thing is the reviews I’ve seen so far have been amazing. It received a 4-star review in Romantic Times Magazine, and a 5-Heart, Reviewers Top-Pick from Night Owl Romance.

I know there are always bumps in the road and you have to make due. So what’s the problem? I’m glad you asked. I expect the bumps, but what I didn’t expect was the huge pot holes I might encounter like the barrage of ugly and hurtful comments about writing romance I received in the last week.

Sure, I’ve heard other writers talk about how authors of romantic fiction get no respect, and I’ve heard my share of “When are you going to start writing real books?” I usually hit them with facts about romantic fiction sales, as well as the intelligent and well-educated women who write and read the genre. This last week I had one woman tell me she read my book and was surprised that it had a plot. That one rolled off my back. The next one was when I was waiting for Twinkle Toes to get dressed after dance so we could leave. One of the other dance moms asked how the book was going and the lady sitting next to me said “Oh you wrote Romeo, Romeo. I read it.” I thanked her and said that I hoped she enjoyed it. She gave me a funny look and said, “I usually don’t read those books, but it was cute.” I just smiled and said “Thanks, I think.” But Friday the 13th, I was left speechless. And for those who know me, speechless is not a state with which I’m familiar. It was a first.

I was at my daughter’s middle school to see her accept her entrée into the Honor Society. Yay! For me, it was a proud moment. For my youngest, it was all about the doughnuts the kids received after they shook the principal’s hand and were given their certificate of achievement and the highly coveted bumper sticker. After wearing her doughnut, and my taking three, count them, three napkins to clean her face off, she left the cafeteria with napkin lint covering her smiling, chubby face.

The eighth graders piled in so I got my things together to leave when a woman I used to see at the gym arrived. I’m tempted to call her by name, but I won’t because I’m not quite that mean. She asked why I hadn’t been to the gym. So I explained about my crazy life—home schooling Twinkle Toes, driving three hours a day, yada, yada, yada. Then she asked if I was still writing. Since I’m always prepared—I’m married to an ex-boy scout, after all—I whip out my beautiful bookmark, which has all three of my book covers on it. Surprised, she said, “You have three books out?” I nodded and told her I was working on my fourth. By this time, most of the 8^th grade had come in and their proud parents surrounded us. Gym Woman waves to everyone in the vicinity, and let me tell you, the place was packed, and at the top of her voice she says, “Robin writes trashy romances. I mean filthy, smutty, trashy romances.”

KLUNK – There went the front axel. I was now the center of attention, and I didn’t know what the heck to say. Then she asked why I didn’t get a real job, like teaching English. Thank God another woman who had a functioning brain stopped and asked me for one of my bookmarks. I handed her one. The wonderful woman looked at it, “You wrote Romeo, Romeo?” I nodded, still speechless. “Didn’t Romeo, Romeo win several awards?” By this time, I found my voice and said, “Yes, it did.” That’s when she turned to Gym Woman and smiled. “It’s so nice to meet an award winning author. I can’t wait for her next book.”

I’m sure that woman will be sainted in the near future. I thanked her and noticed that Gym Woman was nowhere to be found. I spent the rest of the day stewing about Gym Woman and I’ve realized something. While it felt like I hit a huge pot hole, I realized it was really only one more bump in the road. There will always be those who try to knock people down, but as a very good friend of mine said “They can’t knock you down unless you’re up there in the first place.” I got a lot of writing done that day just to spite Gym Woman. I wrote a fabulous fight scene and pictured her face the whole time I was doing it.

Sometimes the bumps in the road can be more than just a pain in the ass. They can cause emotions. You can decide whether you are going to let those bumps lead to something positive or allow them to defeat and damage you like a pot hole might your car. How you choose to look at them is entirely up to you. If I didn’t have a book due, I may have cleaned my whole house. That’s what I used to do whenever I got a mad-on. Anger is a very powerful motivator, as long as you use it for your own good. You can let things eat at you and fester, or you can turn all that power and emotion into something wonderful. In my case, it was a fight scene and believe me, it was one of the most satisfying fight scenes I’ve ever written.

So how do you handle your bumps in the road?

The current year is quickly coming to a close. (Thank, God.  As many of you know, 2009 was not particularly good to me.) Therefore, not much time is left to keep our annual resolutions or reach our yearly goals.  Too often we establish objectives for ourselves, and then the moment we experience a setback or realize we can’t clear the bar we’ve set for ourselves, many of us throw our hands up in total defeat.  I tend to be a perfectionist, so this is especially true for me.  We frequently quit striving despite that we might experience at least a partial success if we would just forge ahead.

My resolution back in January 2009 was to lose 50 pounds, and my professional goal was to write one new book.  Anyone who’s acquainted with me can tell you I haven’t lost a pound, and if anything, I’ve gained a few. (or at least I hope it was only a few)  And other than receiving a fifth nomination for the Golden Heart (the entry for which I actually submitted in December 2008), I also accomplished very little writing-wise this year.  So I may seem like the last person who should address the topic of resolutions and goals.

In reality, my reign as the 2009 poster child for what NOT to do if you want to meet your commitments to yourself has made me an expert on the subject.  Here’s my personal checklist of what NOT to do.

• Don’t allow your health or physical condition to deteriorate.  Doctors visits, tests, and medical procedures not only chew up a lot of precious writing time, but they also leave an individual too distracted to concentrate fully, thereby interrupting one’s creative process. The sedentary act of reading or writing leaves us highly susceptible to illness and weight gain and, in the end, too tired to accomplish much.  It’s important that we make a concerted effort to get enough exercise and eat a healthy diet. (Yes, I know this is beginning to sound like a love letter to myself.)

I’ve been reading a book called Flip the Switch (a guide to resetting the metabolism) by Robert K Cooper, PhD.  He recommends eating six to eight snacks throughout the day (every two to three hours), rather than consuming meals, to keep the metabolism constantly stoked.  Cooper also advocates drinking a gallon of ICE water throughout the day; a) to flush toxins from your body and b) because drinking cold liquids forces your system to work harder to maintain its normal body temperature.

The book also claims we should avoid sitting for more than 30 minutes at any one time.  (Ooops, there goes my alarm to run downstairs to have my 4 oz. container of low fat yogurt, a glass of ice water, and a bathroom break.) BRB

Okay, I’m back.  I know getting up every 30 minutes is a little extreme and too structured to get much accomplished.  Just about the time I get into the zone writing, it’s time to get up again.  So I’m compromising and setting my timer for every 45 minutes and running up and down the stairs twice (with an ice water and bathroom break between trips and a snack if it’s time) and heading right back to whatever I was doing.

Cooper maintains that constantly moving throughout the day keeps the basal metabolic rate consistently high, whereas a standard 30-60 minute hour workout only gives a boost for a few hours.  (That’s not to say one shouldn’t also do strength training to build muscle.)  So that’s what I’m trying to do.  I’ll let you know how it works.

• Don’t allow yourself get to become too distracted by yahoo loops, blogs, e-mail, research, and the Internet in general.  To remedy this, I’m trying to limit myself to one hour a day to read and respond to message boards, blogs, and e-mail.  Again, I’m using a timer.  I’ll also let you know how that works out.

• Don’t plan more than two vacations a year.  I hate to discourage anyone from getting away and enjoying life.  However, I have to list this because it was one of the big reasons I accomplished so little this year.  By the end of 2009, my total getaways will add up to SIX. (I know, poor me.  Boo-hoo, I had to go away six times!) The problem was I spent so much time planning, researching, and booking reservations for rental cars, flights, hotels, shows, restaurants, and attractions I feel like an amateur travel agent.  And don’t get me started on how much time I spent packing and unpacking or how eating in restaurants on six vacations did nothing to help me keep my resolution to lose weight.

• Don’t let yourself get too involved in socializing and partying. (I’m writing this after spending three solid weeks concentrating on planning my daughter-in-law’s baby shower.)  Inasmuch as I highly recommend entering the Golden Heart, I must also warn about the big pitfall that comes with it if you’re a finalist–you make so many wonderful new friends it’s difficult not to get caught up in spending a lot of your usual writing time with them.  Not to mention, all that partying also did nothing to reduce my waistline.

• Don’t find excuses not to work at your goal EVERY day.  Even if you only have enough time to write one sentence or do a tiny bit toward your objective (like climb an extra flight of stairs), do it.  Any idiot knows that if you consistently focus on your goals, you’re more likely to achieve them.  Once you get started doing whatever it is you need to do, you’ll find it’s easy to continue.

Do you see a common thread in this message?  The solution to reaching our objectives and keeping resolutions can be summed up in one word.  DISCIPLINE.   At the same time, we also shouldn’t expect the impossible from ourselves.

Everyone’s life is different, and, therefore, everyone’s list of DOs and DON’Ts vary.  An effective motivational program should only include objectives that are actually attainable and place YOU in control of whether you succeed.  Setting goals that you have little or no control over is pointless and a surefire recipe for failure. Set your targets at a challenging level but not so high that success will be impossible to achieve.

There goes that dang alarm again.  Gotta run!

Before I go, what are some of the obstacles in your way, and what do you need to put at the top of your “Things Not to Do If You Want to Reach Your Goals” list?

I’m also blogging at http://www.rubyslipperedsisterhood.com today, so stop over and say hi.

Last year I was asked to speak to a Romance Book Club at a local bookstore.  It was a double debut–not only were they reading my first book, Scandalous Lord, Rebellious Miss, but it was also the very first meeting of the club.  I think that there were only four people at that first meeting, but I had  a great time–hey, I was just excited that someone other than my mother and my CPs had read and enjoyed Charles and Sophie’s story!

But more than that, I was truly tickled at the idea of a book club devoted to Romance.  No offense to Oprah and her followers, or any other book club out there, but I cannot take a steady diet of books heavy with misery, abuse and hopelessness.  I read many sorts of books, but I always find myself coming back to the life-and-love-affirming beauty of Romance.  Yes, our characters do struggle with pain and trauma and demons both personal and literal, but they always find the inner strength to defeat their obstacles and emerge stronger, more confident and truly ready for their  Happily Ever After.  I love that.

But, like many writers, I found that I was reading far less than I used to, and I missed it.  So I stayed on in the club as a member, thinking it would keep me motivated to keep reading–and I’m so glad I did!  Our group has grown a lot in the last couple of years.  We have many more members and a core group that makes it to most meetings.  We’re a fun mix of readers and reader/writers and we’ve grown to know each other–and our taste in books–pretty well.  We are a loud and opinionated and lovely bunch.  We have read every sub genre of romance and had a grand time dissecting them all.

I think most writers would agree that writing changes how you read–and not always for the better.  Some of the best things this group does for me is to remind me of that fresh perspective–and remind me to slow down and take joy in my favorite genre again.

So this is a Big Thank You to the ladies of the Romance Book Club at the Brier Creek Barnes and Noble.  Nothing beats hanging out with people who love what you love.  You guys rock–Thank you for making the second Wednesday of the month so great!

Do you belong to a book club?  Does your book club read Romance?  If you are a writer, do you read as much as you used to–and do you still enjoy it as much as you did before you started writing?