| By Shelley Coriell | November 4, 2009 |
Five years ago I joined a local citizen’s police academy, and I failed our first assignment. Not just failed, I completely bombed.
In a getting-to-know-you exercise, the police officer running the class asked everyone to tell the group three things about themselves. Two true. One lie. “I knit. I crochet. I sew,” I said. Apparently I let loose a major body twitch/eye-tick on the “I knit” comment, and every member of the academy correctly dinged me for lying. They were right. I can’t knit.
And apparently, I can’t lie, either.
My current young adult manuscript is all about lies. Big fat lies. Little white lies. Lies that kill. As I researched lies and liars for this manuscript, I went back through my police academy notes and reacquainted myself with the cues our bodies give off when we tell tales. Someone fibbing to you may:
- Offer little or no eye contact
- Shift body, face or knees (if sitting) away from you
- Touch face, especially lips or throat
- Exhibit stiff, unnatural hand gestures
- Place objects between you
- Speak louder or faster, or give more details than necessary
It didn’t surprise me that we spent time in the citizen’s police academy talking about lying because, well, bad guys lie.
But are bad guys the only ones who lie? In my current YA manuscript, my female protagonist, who’s haunted by a lie from her past, asks the question, “When is it okay to lie?” My young, hunky hero who has secrets of his own softly pipes in, “When you need to protect someone.”
So let’s talk lies. Are you good at spotting liars? Can you lie? Is it ever okay to lie? How do you feel about heroes or heroines who lie?
November 4th, 2009 at 4:40 am
Heroes and heroines who lie are okay—if they do so with good reason. Why? Because people lie, even if only to themselves. Those who lie to protect or spare someone unnescessary pain or sorrow do so for the right reasons. Of course, sometimes those ‘caring untruths’ come back to bite you and we must remember the old adage, The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
So, lying is intrinsically wrong. Lying for the sake of lying or to deceive someone for selfish purposes is wrong. Lying to spare someone (Oh, honey, no one saw the toilet paper stuck to your shoe) or do some other kindness, while not high on the ethics scale, is acceptable—at least in my world.
November 4th, 2009 at 10:14 am
Interesting post, Shelley!
Lying is human nature. Not the manipulative, selfish lying, but certainly I imagine we all lie at some point during the day.
“Those pants don’t make your butt look big.”
“Dinner was delicious, honey.”
“What a pleasure running into you. Has it been that long?”
If we didn’t filter what we really thought through these social niceties, think of the chaos and heartache that would ensue.
Now as for me, I’m the worst liar around. I flush, I stumble over my words … No life of crime in my future.
November 4th, 2009 at 10:17 am
Great theme for a story, Shelley. My characters lie to themselves all the time. I love the show Lie to Me. If you haven’t seen it, check it out. It’s so cool how people can’t help but give away their deceit.
November 4th, 2009 at 10:55 am
Gwynlyn, Thanks for popping out of your writing cave to chat about lies! Excellent point about how we lie to ourselves at one time or another. I guess lies can help us cope or boost flagging egos or spirits. Or maybe some of us aren’t grounded in reality. Which is why we write.
November 4th, 2009 at 11:06 am
I agree, Alex, that lying is human nature. Take a look at toddlers and preschoolers who haven’t quite learned all the rules. “Did you eat that cookie?” “No, mommy,” junior says around a mouthful of crumbs. Junior clearly has a sense of right and wrong, but self-preservation outweighs truth.
And I LOVE your point about filters. I think we all know a few folks who are painfully and needlessly blunt. “I’m just being honest,” they say. No, you’re just being mean! Peace!
November 4th, 2009 at 11:17 am
Haven’t seen Lie to Me yet, Laurie, but I hear it’s pretty good. The concept of a human lie detector fascinates me. I agree that most people can’t help but give away their deceit, but think about those few who can, the master liars of this world. Brrrr. So how do they do it? Are they incredible actors? Have they convinced themselves they are telling the truth? Thanks for stopping by!
November 4th, 2009 at 12:57 pm
Great post, Shelley. Have you seen The Invention of Lying? Silly film… but it does explore what the world would be like if no one lied. Not so great, really.
November 4th, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Ha, I not only can’t tell when someone’s lying, I can’t pass a lie detector test if I’m telling the truth, so I can really identify with the group being able to tell you were lying.
November 4th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
I’m told I’m a terrible liar. Would I lie to you?
A big yes to what Gwynlyn and Laurie said about our characters lying to themselves.
Or they omit telling the whole truth and mislead the other character.
Interesting list of ‘tells.’ Thanks!
November 4th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Maureen, I can’t imagine a world of absolute truth. But boy it would sure make first dates and meetings with in-laws rather interesting, wouldn’t it? Hee hee.
November 4th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Diana, When I was a magazine editor, one of my writers researched and wrote a story on the use of lie detector tests as employee screening tools. She underwent an employment lie detector test and “failed.” The company administering the test labeled her “Not recommended for employment.” I had a good laugh about it because she was a great employee and a fantastic writer. Ever since that, I haven’t put a lot of faith in those pesky machines. Thanks for chiming in!
November 4th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
Omission certainly adds a whole new layer to lying, Gail. As you mentioned, half-truths can mislead, and remaining silent when a truth should be told can be even more disastrous. Peace!
November 4th, 2009 at 4:48 pm
Funnily enough, there’s a movie coming out soon with Ricky Gervais called The Invention of Lying about a man who lives in a world where nobody lies, then he works out how…sounds interesting!
I don’t mind when heroes and heroines lie, as long as they’re motivated by something. Usually in books the truth comes out which is part of the tension for the reader…the “when will they get caught out, when will they get caught out thing”.
November 4th, 2009 at 6:02 pm
Great post, Shelley, and great idea to have lying as the theme of your book. I’m not a big fan of lying although I can’t say I’ve never lied. I think I was 14 or 15 when I took my sister’s car (had a key made and everything) and backed the car right into a retaining wall. A neighbor watched the whole thing and called my mom later that night. I told Mom that the neighbor woman was crazy and that I found the car smashed into the retaining wall and I was only trying to get it out of the road. Mom believed me.
November 4th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
LOL! OMGosh, Theresa, that’s too funny!
November 4th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
Shelley, great post! If you’ve ever seen Jim Carey’s Liar Liar, that is a great example of why characters need to lie out of kindness as many have indicated here today.
I took part in a Citizens Academy also, as well as volunteered for my local sheriff’s office. We didn’t use a polygraph, we used a voice activation machine, and I bombed. Not on the harmless questions… The question that made the monitor go up and down was… Have you ever done something so heinous it would prevent you from being accepted in this assignment?
I remember swallowing on that question and sure enough, in comes the sergeant and my supervisors and while my face was scarlet, they were laughing. My supervisor told me she failed that question too. They accepted me, so obviously they didn’t hold it against me. But let’s just say I was glad I wasn’t a suspect at that moment.
November 4th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Excellent point, Melanie, motivation is everything. Perhaps we can paint a broad brush stroke and say characters lying for a “greater good” are acceptable, although “greater good” is rather subjective, isn’t it? Thanks goodness for shades of gray…it gives writers so much to work with.
November 4th, 2009 at 7:01 pm
Finally, someone fesses up to a whopper of a lie. Thanks, Theresa! Your brush with car thievery is a hoot, but even funnier is your mom’s reaction. Gotta love a mother’s love. Did you ever tell mummy the truth? Too funny!
November 4th, 2009 at 7:18 pm
Ooooo…do tell, Donnell, about the heinous things you’ve done.
Seriously, that question alone is enough to send various body parts hither and yon. Heinous? What do they mean by heinous? Is it heinous if I thought it but didn’t do it? See, I’m feeling your stress! Thanks for stopping by!
November 4th, 2009 at 7:22 pm
Ha! Yes, I did fess up to all of my lies and Mom still has a hard time believing I would lie let alone take my sister’s car.
I have quite a few doozers unfortunately…one of the reasons I never believed my kids when they said they were going to their friends to study…and other things like that. 
November 4th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
I’m not sure I could like to save my life. I’m serious! When I see those beady little eyes staring at me as I speak..I jsut can’t do it. I can’t even tell a little white lie at home…!
November 5th, 2009 at 12:01 am
Shelley –
Wonderful information on fibbers! There’s only one thing that worries me, and that’s the fact that I do many of these things when I’m telling the truth – I speak too quickly sometimes, offer too much info, and often have a nervous habit of pushing my hair out of my face. It’s more from having confidence issues (but I can write my heart out and no one has to look at me) than anything else. So now I wonder, do people think I’m lying all the time?
November 5th, 2009 at 12:05 am
Not lying is a fine thing, Donna. Thanks for stopping by!
November 5th, 2009 at 12:55 am
Stacey, I’m a hair fiddler, too, so we’ll look like liars together.